Saturday, October 10, 2009

*sigh* draaaama drama drama >.<

Well, one of my "friends" has finally shown his true colors, he has completely snapped, saying things that I have proof are lies, insulting me, the usual bs... And honestly, I feel kinda good that i can now just call the friendship off, I dont need somebody that is so negative in my life, all of his talk about slitting peoples throats, ripping out their guts, burning them alive... I think I shall be quite happy without having to listen to that crap anymore, without having to worry about when he is going to snap and hurt somebody, and without having such a person who's very presence is oppressive hovering around me anymore... I feel good about cutting him out of my life, even if its not the way I would've preferred things to go, its how I need them to be right now.

Tuesday, October 6, 2009

I pity da foo.

"...And one day he would look back upon the fool and know the fool.
Even now he could feel the start of the long journey, the leave-taking, the going-away from the self he had been."-Ray Bradbury

I am a fool, more often than not I react in foolish ways, not always harmful, but pretty much always embarrassing,lol... I used to really hate this aspect of myself, but lately Ive grown to kinda embrace it, well not the harmful aspects of being a fool, but the fact that I am one, and for the most part just about everyone else is, and that in the end all we can hope to do is learn how to laugh at our silly foolish moments, get up during our clumsy foolish moments, and learn to go on living and loving after our truly terrible foolish moments... I guess Ive just come to the realization that you have no chance to beat the fool in you until you accept the fool in you... Dont know if that makes any sense to anybody else,lol, but its a little bit of whats been running through my mind lately...

Friday, October 2, 2009

Friends...

I just realized I dont really have any, not real ones at least, every single one of them except maybe one of them pretty much thinks they are better than me, thinks ima loser, or worse, who knows, maybe by their standard I am, All I know is that by MY standards I am the best person I can be at this point in my life, I do my best to love others and be there for them, I do the best I can to get by in life with what ive got to work with, and if thats not good enough for them they can kiss my ass...